Something to lighten the mood a bit…
Feel free to edit, re-write and/or submit your own versions:
On the twelfth day of Christmas EpiUsers gave to me:
//twelve monkey code blocks
eleven slams on widgets
grid rows a-leaping
nine dumpster fires
eight failed edge agents
seven(hundred) Wonsil dad jokes
six epi-cases…
“Working as designed!”
four Beetle conjurs
Threats of some Rage Quitting
Classic Sunset panic
and a handful of expired ideas.
We should ask AI to give him a wand.
He does look like Professor Snape 
One in the same…and Die Hard was his first movie role.
I thought so but wasn’t sure.
He was also the voice of God, don’t forget 
'Twas the Night of the Upgrade
By a Sleep-Deprived Epicor Admin
’Twas the night of the upgrade, and all through the shop,
Not a user was working; production was stopped.
The backups were stored in the cloud with care,
In hopes that a new version soon would be there.
The users were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of faster reports danced in their heads.
And I with my coffee, and Support on chat,
Had settled at our consoles for a long upgrade spat.
When out on the network arose such a clatter,
I sprang to PDT to stack trace the matter.
RDP into the appserver in a flash,
Checking performance, fearing a crash.
The glow of the monitors flickered and peaked,
As we poured through the traces seeking the leak
When what to my bleary eyes should appear,
But a miniature sleigh and eight tiny reindeer.
With a jolly old driver, so lively and deftly,
I knew in a moment it must be St. Epi
More rapid than fiber his coursers they came,
And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name:
“Now Analyzer! Now Solution! Now CTT and Packer!
On BAQs! On Checklist! On Entry and Tracker!!
To the top of the logs! To the top of the stack!
Now upgrade away! Upgrade and pack!”
As the database Passes before Upgrade Services fly,
When they meet with resistance, they workaround and retry.
So up to current Kinetic they flew,
With a sleigh full of datafixes—and St. Epi, too.
And then, in a twinkling, I heard in the hall,
The prancing and pawing of Kinetic energy and all.
As I shook my head and was turning around,
Down the cables St. Epi came with a bound.
He was dressed all in red, from his head to his shoes,
And his fingers were nimble—he knew all the clues.
A bundle of user guides he had in his pack,
And he looked like a pro as he finished his hack.
His eyes—how they twinkled! His dimples, how merry!
His cheeks were stored like procedures, his nose joined like a query!
His droll little mouth was drawn up in a grin,
And great silver beard sat on his admin chin.
He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
Documented everything; then turned with a smirk.
And laying his finger aside of his nose,
And giving a nod, up the instance he rose.
He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a cheer,
And away they all flew, never a fear.
But I heard him exclaim, as he drove out of sight—
“Happy Sunset to all, and to all a good night!
And next Christmas movie…
